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Feb 19, 2023Liked by Jo Elvin

I find this whole topic disturbing. I live in the States and work for local government. As my colleagues put it, our pay is “dog shit.” No one I work with or regularly come in contact with has the the resources to tap into these anti-aging measures for the foreseeable future. My concern is that using these resources will become a marker of wealth, status, and hireability and will increase the stratification of society. I already feel that people see untouched faces and think, “Why is that person so tired/old/sad?” I think if we are not already there that the use of these tools will mark out who is even considered for higher positions and higher pay and even getting hired in whole industries.

I would absolutely use these and/or other measures if I had access to them. This isn’t an attack of them or people for using them. God knows we can all understand the allure. It just concerns me how gatekeeping increasingly, rapidly applies to our faces.

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Very interesting piece. I was shocked when I first saw Love Island, the fact that teens are under the kind of pressure to start altering their faces before they've even finished growing or seeing what their adult face will look like is just so depressing. I think we just need to keep celebrating ageing and stop glorifying youth. That friend you posted for example, Anna Murphy, is so flipping beautiful!

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Jo, this is so well written & thought provoking. I hadn’t heard all the chatter about Madonna at the Grammys this year, but your insight on the cycle of judgement & impossible standards was spot on. Sometimes it seems so difficult to age gracefully! Thank you for sharing your thoughts on it.

By the way~ from your picture it’s easy to see you were absolutely stunning in your 30s (what a ridiculous surgeon!). I believe time, wisdom, age, and experience only expand what’s already beautiful.🥂

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I was on a cruise late last year in the Med. A work trip. One of the things I didn’t write about (as not relevant for the publication) was the smorgasbord of enhancements. Those that I could see anyway. It would range from subtle to a couple from Miami who had maybe watched nip/tuck too many times. They were positively feline in look, the guy with jet black dyed hair, which made me think he was perhaps like me, mid forties or above. Stood next to them in a queue to disembark I immediately felt a little older, and a lot less flash (they were dripping in labels). Which surprised me. If anything when I feel this I just think more about what I’m eating (occupational hazard), how much exercise I’m getting and sleep. The pressure is obviously different for men than women but I think increasingly it’s a pressure some men are feeling. The amount of Mens care products from grooming to diet to radical exercise programs to hair loss/ replacement that I get served in social is huge. Not yet cosmetic surgery but surely that’s next.

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I frankly hate the term ‘tweakment’ and you’re right, it has normalised invasive and expensive procedures. These treatments are veering into that other phrase I hate of being something we “must have”.

I’m 61 and haven’t tweaked anything. Oddly, letting my hair grow out was weirdly and joyfully empowering.

But occasionally I do catch sight of my mother in the mirror and wonder if I might be tempted to try something - not least because I’m often not only the oldest in the room, but also the only one to have never done anything and I wonder what I’d look like if I had 😃

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I’m 34 and I didn’t have Botox until I was 32... late compared to some of my friends, early compared to others!

I agree that we really need to leave the judgement at the door.

And I really feel for Madonna - she just cannot win either way! And she’s not alone!

Jo - you look banging and I LOVED glamour when you were at the helm!

I reckon just we just need to do what feels right for “you” - but I agree about the same look and I am worried we will all “look the same” if we’re not careful... the melted wax look is not my fave.

And what is this bucchal fat removal I keep reading about?! When does it end?!

I’ve stuck to Botox for now but wouldn’t rule out filler / profilho when I get older!

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This is really interesting - I distinctly remember sending you a Tweet just after you left as Editor of Glamour asking your thoughts on the new version of the magazine. The very first edition had a huge article on Tweakments (the first time I had seen the word) including the ludicrous suggestion that Earlobes were fair game for a little injection along with forehead, laughter lines and lips. I did not renew my subscription as it felt like it had become yet another magazine forcing women to look a certain way by stealth. I am now 46 and haven't had any work and can't imagine doing so but some of my colleagues do and it does seems a slippery slope. One friend has had regular botox since she was in her mid 30s and has now begun having lip fillers. I just imagine the lovely holiday I could have with that money. I'm trying to embrace my lines and stay proud of not giving in - it's becoming a deliberate act of defiance to not do what is expected of me.

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