This made me laugh, thank you for sharing - love the mad train waving!
I have accrued quite a few cringefest moments over the years, my favourite being the time I went into a swanky designer store at 21, feeling way too unsophisticated to be in such hallowed environs.
I was being served by a not-very-friendly salesperson which made me feel more on edge. She took my dress to the fitting room with me trailing behind. I got there and tried to move past someone who was in the way, doing an awkward bob from side to side while muttering ‘sorry, sorry, excuse me’. I thought, ‘that girl has the same jacket on as me’. And then, I realised … it was me, in a mirror. The salesperson was watching the entire time, clearly unimpressed. I decided to get contact lenses after that.
Then, going out for lunch with my sister’s older friend, again, feeling a wee bit out of depth in a cool city bar, as I was only around 16 or 17. I was wiping my mouth with my napkin and wondering why it felt so wet. Until I looked down and saw that it was indeed wet, because it was the massive leaf of lettuce that had been on my plate.
Oh, and the time I turned up to a work event
and plonked myself down at the table, declaring: ‘I’m absolutely ravishing’.
Oh Jo, thank you. How lovely to share this, and give us all the gift of a smile and a laugh! Hearing the birds sing away again has been bringing such joy to my heart, even as I mourn the twinkling lights of Christmas. Your lovely, funny stories, have got me trotting back down memory lane to my own cringe-y moments...some of which I am still not ready to re-live - and could definitely never share, so congratulations on your bravery at not only re-living them, but playing them out to a wider audience, too! X
I think that there is a BOOK in this idea, Jo : getting people to fess up their most 'shaming' moments !! The First one which comes to mind is that when quite heavily pregnant with my son, I decided to go swimming - at the Virgin Active in Fulham. I had managed to manoevre my not insignificant bump (I am a six foot tall woman, some say 'Amazonian' - ha) into my maternity swimsuit, and then got into the pool, only to discover I was in the 'wrong lane'... ie it was very busy with Non-pregnant people racing up and down it. I didn't want to get my hair wet (which now seems the least of my worries, at this point) so I decided to 'change lanes' by stepping Over those annoying plastic chain things they use to divide the lanes... but Then, a very officious Eastern European female life-guard (who I hazard a guess had Not been pregnant yet) took it upon herself to Tell Me Off ... what for, I am not sure, but I was so hormonal and embarrassed, I started crying ! Of course in a very "I'm English, I'm not crying, I've just got water coming out of my eyes"-kind of way. I feel like there are so many of these moments in my life, when I stop to think about it ! Happy New Year XXXX
This made me laugh, thank you for sharing - love the mad train waving!
I have accrued quite a few cringefest moments over the years, my favourite being the time I went into a swanky designer store at 21, feeling way too unsophisticated to be in such hallowed environs.
I was being served by a not-very-friendly salesperson which made me feel more on edge. She took my dress to the fitting room with me trailing behind. I got there and tried to move past someone who was in the way, doing an awkward bob from side to side while muttering ‘sorry, sorry, excuse me’. I thought, ‘that girl has the same jacket on as me’. And then, I realised … it was me, in a mirror. The salesperson was watching the entire time, clearly unimpressed. I decided to get contact lenses after that.
Then, going out for lunch with my sister’s older friend, again, feeling a wee bit out of depth in a cool city bar, as I was only around 16 or 17. I was wiping my mouth with my napkin and wondering why it felt so wet. Until I looked down and saw that it was indeed wet, because it was the massive leaf of lettuce that had been on my plate.
Oh, and the time I turned up to a work event
and plonked myself down at the table, declaring: ‘I’m absolutely ravishing’.
And the list goes on!
What a miserable bunch on that train. I applaud your exuberance, Jo!
Oh Jo, thank you. How lovely to share this, and give us all the gift of a smile and a laugh! Hearing the birds sing away again has been bringing such joy to my heart, even as I mourn the twinkling lights of Christmas. Your lovely, funny stories, have got me trotting back down memory lane to my own cringe-y moments...some of which I am still not ready to re-live - and could definitely never share, so congratulations on your bravery at not only re-living them, but playing them out to a wider audience, too! X
Brilliantly written, and it is true that Januarying is such a thing! Just kill me. :)
I think that there is a BOOK in this idea, Jo : getting people to fess up their most 'shaming' moments !! The First one which comes to mind is that when quite heavily pregnant with my son, I decided to go swimming - at the Virgin Active in Fulham. I had managed to manoevre my not insignificant bump (I am a six foot tall woman, some say 'Amazonian' - ha) into my maternity swimsuit, and then got into the pool, only to discover I was in the 'wrong lane'... ie it was very busy with Non-pregnant people racing up and down it. I didn't want to get my hair wet (which now seems the least of my worries, at this point) so I decided to 'change lanes' by stepping Over those annoying plastic chain things they use to divide the lanes... but Then, a very officious Eastern European female life-guard (who I hazard a guess had Not been pregnant yet) took it upon herself to Tell Me Off ... what for, I am not sure, but I was so hormonal and embarrassed, I started crying ! Of course in a very "I'm English, I'm not crying, I've just got water coming out of my eyes"-kind of way. I feel like there are so many of these moments in my life, when I stop to think about it ! Happy New Year XXXX
I definitely feel Januaryed one week in!
Jo. Brilliant! Thanks for making me laugh this grey January day. Parks and Rec does it for me...
OMG I am actually laughing so loud sat at my desk at work! HA HA!!!!
I love Schitt’s Creek! You are right, this January calls for a rewatch 😅